I’ll see you at SGC!

Nice to finally be able to make this “officially public.” I’ll be in Texas the weekend of July 4th for the ScrewAttack Gaming Convention (in my capacity as The Game OverThinker), and I hope to see some fans and well-wishers there, too 😉

More details of this will likely follow. Details on the Convention itself can be found HERE: http://sgconvention.com/

Plastic

To help us all through monday, here’s a slideshow of Megan Fox performing softcore sex-acts on a mannequin of herself for Interview Magazine. Really.

(EMBED CHANGED TO LINK BECAUSE IT MIGHT LOOK NSFW AT A DISTANCE)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iiPTa1wod_0&feature=player_embedded#at=11

Now… I know “mannequin parts” are kind of a schlocky mock-surrealist photography staple, but there aren’t really too many ways to interpret the “point” of this that don’t add up to some sort of either ironic or dark commentary on Fox’s onscreen persona and/or her “relationship” with the same, right? This is either “this woman IS a mannequin” or “this woman is used as a mannequin.”

So the operative question would be… is she a REALLY good sport, or does she not “get it?”

This is also more like it

Finally, we have some on-set footage of actors and sets for “Thor”… unfortunately, it’s from “Entertainment Tonight,” so the “interview” is more interested in Chris Hemsworth’s appearance on “Dancing With The Stars.” Though it IS mildly amusing to watch Hemsworth and Portman doing what appears to be either a really good impression of actors who hooked-up while making a movie OR a really bad impression of actors who didn’t hook-up while making a movie.

In any case, we’ve got our first look at Anthony Hopkins as Odin and – at about 3:56 – Idris Elba as Heimdall. Hopkins looks about like you’d expect, but Heimdall…. holy SHIT! Dig that crazy Kirby-esque armor, complete with the bright red and gold finish and the HUGE horns (wings?) on the helmet. Set rumors have been saying that Thor’s “Asgard” stuff is shockingly faithful to the 60s to 80s comic designs, and this seems to agree with that. Crom… does this means Loki is going to have the gold/green outfit and the big curled horns? I hope so…

http://www.etonline.com/media/flash/FlowPlayerDark224.swf?config=

Here’s what REALLY intrigues me, though (Iron Man 2 SPOILER WARNING): Right near the start, we see Thor in what I guess are his “street clothes” (or maybe it’s a rehersal?) beating up some uniformed guards (soldiers?) in what looks like a temporary military installation. Other “Earth” scenes seem to be set in an American desert locale. Remember Nick Fury complaining about his “trouble in the Southwest” in Iron Man 2? Is THIS what he was talking about? Are those military-looking guys S.H.I.E.L.D.? Is that part of the story here, S.H.I.E.L.D. trying to contain or “cover up” Asgardians or whatnot on Earth?

This is really happening.

Now this is more like it…

Fresh from the runup to E3 comes this week’s SECOND big video on the subject of Mortal Kombat reboots, in this case a “back to formula” 3D-graphics/2D-gameplay entry very likely inspired by the success of “Street Fighter IV.”

Contained therein: Magic powers, fantastical realms, transdimensional ninjas who look like transdimensional ninjas doing things you’d expect transdimensional ninjas to do and colors found in locations other than a scrap metal yard. What a novel idea…

Mortal Kombat Video Game, E3 2010: Debut Trailer Game Trailers & Videos GameTrailers.com

Yeah, THAT would all look soooo much better if they were all in jeans and hoodies…

Mortal Kombat reboot pitch is gritty, also shitty

Yes, I’ve seen this. You can stop asking now, alright?

This has been all the rage this week, mostly thanks to it showing up without any indication as to what it was “selling.” Now we know: It’s a “professional fan-film” made by a guy trying to sell a “reboot” pitch to the rights holders. With professional-looking shorts getting easier to produce, we’ll probably end up seeing a lot more of these for “genre” franchises.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_MqZn7E-mk

Honestly… I think it looks like crap. Not that the other “Kombat” movies were any great shakes, and the guy certainly has the technical chops for spot-on recreating the Saw/Hostel “house style” to saying nothing of the ability to aquire the aid of Jeri Ryan and Michael Jai White.

But the “angle” he’s pitching, a “realistic” gritty revamp of the series with the various supernatural Kombatants reworked as psychos with skin conditions or body-mod fetishes? BLEGH. No, thank you.

Y’know… we’re coming up on the 35th Anniversary of “Jaws” next week. Whole books have been written making the case that, even though they stand up as great films in their own right, “Jaws” and “Star Wars” ultimately had a negative impact on moviemaking by creating the blockbuster mentality. I dunno how much truth there’s ever been in that thesis, but I’m starting to feel like one day I’ll be feeling something similar about Christopher Nolan’s “Batman” movies… loving them as films but HATING the impact they’re having on genre film, i.e. making this kind of grim-and-gritty, “realistic,” suck-the-weird-out-of-everything reimagining the order of the day.

To hell with “grounded,” and fuck “realism.” I can’t wait to see the “realistic” version of Superman, where instead of Krypton he’s from Canada or something, and instead of flying he’s just a pretty good helicopter pilot.

A Dictionary Of Political Ideologies… as-translated by Americans

CONSERVATIVE: “The Government should be as small an uninvolved in everyday life as possible. Umm… except in matters of art, expression and personal morality – particularly as it pertains to sex – THERE it should be as involved as possible. Oh, and that part of Government that’s The Army? That can be as big and involved as it wants, because tanks are wicked-awesome.”

LIBERAL: “The Government should be as big an involved in everyday life as possible. Umm… Except in matters of art, expression and personal morality – particularly as it pertains to sex – THERE it should have nothing to say whatsoever. Oh, and that part of Government that’s The Army? That part can take a hike, because guns are mean and scary.”

LIBERTARIAN: “The Government should be small, period. If that smallness means some of us ‘don’t make it?’ Well, that’s too bad, but I’m not giving up my freedom for their security.”

OBJECTIVIST: “The Government should be small, period. If that smallness means some of us ‘don’t make it?’ Heh! I shall take fetishistic joy in witnessing the fall of the inferior.”

SOCIALIST: “The economic castes of human society are unjust and corrupt, and must be equalized… to the degree that “equalization” will allow me to still have a decent apartment.”

COMMUNIST: “I am a Socialist (see above) and I am also desperately needy for attention. Pay attention to me! Pay attention to me!”

ANARCHIST: “I am trying to pursue a sexual relationship with a woman who calls herself an Anarchist.”

Get Him To The Greek

If there’s ONE reason to see “Get Him To The Greek,” it’s to be dumbstruck by just how strong Puff Daddy’s (or whatever it is now) comedy chops are. Seriously. Granted, he’s doing self-parody, but it’s a very particular sort that also calls for him to play a slow-burning nutcase. However you feel about him (I’ve never been a fan, myself) it’s a remarkable turn, considering he steals whole scenes out from under professional comedians.

The movie itself is a mixed bag. It’s funny, because Jonah Hill and Russell Brand are funny, but it’s too schizophrenic to hold together as anything other than a series of sketches – though it tries to “excuse” this scattershot storytelling by leaning heavily on the device of Brand’s Aldous Snow being an unstable drug addict.

Snow, we’re expected to recall, was the “wild card” supporting player in Jason Segel’s “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” – a pop-musician who was the subject of a “fan-crush” by Jonah Hill’s schlubby hotel employee. “Greek” is meant to be a reprise of this chemistry, blown up to feature status. Hill is technically playing an entirely DIFFERENT character this time, but mostly for reasons of plot – otherwise it’s the same idea: He’s an overeager music geek with a particular appreciation for Aldous Snow, trying to rise through the ranks of junior music executive at Diddy’s label. He pitches an anniversary concert to mark the public return of Snow, who’s descended into a walking joke after a disasterous concept album and a bad breakup. He (Hill) ultimately gets sadled with the responsibility of shepherding the famous-erratic singer from London to L.A.

So, “Planes, Trains & Automobiles” meets “Cheech & Chong,” is the idea, and there’ve certainly been worse ones. Oddly, what ultimately derails it is it’s connection to “Sarah Marshall.” It’s trying hard to work as a buddy picture, which means it has to be “affecting” at times and develop Snow as a well-rounded character – which it pulls off, and Brand has an impressive range – but since Snow was concieved as a broad satire it’s undercut every time we see or hear him performing one of his songs, which are obviously spoofs. Twice we’re treated to sincere scenes in which Snow is “ressurected” onstage by the joy of performing and the affection of his fans, and both times the effect is blown because he’s singing jokey tunes about venereal disease and British snackfood double-entendres.