From the looks of things, watching for seams-showing where FX and editing were employed to turn the “Red Dawn” remake’s bad guys from China to North Korea will be a lot more interesting than the movie itself…

I’m making an effort to be more positive lately, so let’s momentarily ignore the fact that this movie apparently sucks so profoundly that it’s been sitting on a shelf for three years and focus on some stuff I actually LIKED in this trailer:

1. Shot with the snow-globe is a clever repurposing of the “Jurassic Park Effect.”

2.) Thor being a returned-veteran is a potentially interesting twist – assuming he’s either coming back from Iraq or Afghanistan (remember, this was actually made in 2009) he’s essentially going from combating an insurgency to partcipating in one.

3.) The notion of North Korea being able to invade a Dennys, much less the United States, is still laughable on it’s face; but an EMP weapon is a good-enough solution to handwaving how such an asymmetrical invasion might be at least attempted.

Also, it just occured to me: Since the goal of the re-edit was to stay on the Chinese market’s good side (and let’s be clear here: China invading the U.S. militarily is every bit as dumb as North Korea), will they bother to address the now-present plothole of why China doesn’t bomb NK into the Stone Age for invading a country they’ve got billions of dollars invested in? Let’s get real for a minute here – before the Wolverines would’ve even had time to gather ammo, wouldn’t a Red Army detachment be in Pyonyang asking that they please stop touching their stuff?

Chems? Chems. Need more Chems.

“Intermission” is called Upside of Down.

http://cdn-static.liverail.com/js/handshake.html

It’s not really being reported as a “major” entertainment story, but Seth MacFarlane’s “Ted” is probably going to end up being one of the biggest hits of the year – it’s actually doing bigger business than “The Dark Knight Rises” in a lot of Europe right now – even moreso given it cost so relatively little to actually make.

That kind of impact makes waves, and this is probably the first visible one: “ALF” is heading to the big screen.

If you’re under the age of… I dunno, 20 maybe?, this is quite possibly (pardon the pun) totally alien to you: “ALF” (“Alien Life Form”) was a sitcom in the 80s that was HUGE for about two years then pretty-much fell off the planet. Basic pitch: “What if E.T. was an obnoxious troublemaking goof and a whole family was hiding him instead of just a kid?” Pupeteer Paul Fusco voiced and performed the title character (he’s supposedly being sought for the movie, though the charcter will probably be CGI), a child-sized furry alien who was the last-survivor of the recently-exploded planet Melmac and wound up living with a sitcom-standard suburban family: Exasperated/dweeby dad, nagging mom, teenaged daughter, precocious son, nosy neighbors, etc.

For the brief period that the show was the biggest thing in pop-culture, there was “Alf” merchandise everywhere and even an animated prequel-series set on Melmac. Today, the series is probably best remembered for it’s notoriously dark, unresolved final episode: A running subplot in the series involved Alf being sought by nefarious government agents, and the fourth season ended on a cliffhanger wherein he was finally exposed and captured moments before he was to make contact with another crew of survivors. The creators believed they were getting one more season, but the show was canceled soon after that and they never got to; meaning that this heavily-kid targeted comedy series essentially ends with the main character and his surrogate family being dragged away by the Men In Black. (The story was “resolved” in the god-awful TV movie “Project A.L.F.” a decade later.)

Let’s get this out of the way, first: Yes, endorsing Mitt Romney for president does make Clint Eastwood significantly less cool – which is to say, still cooler than YOU… just not by as much.*

Anyway, here’s the trailer for “Trouble With The Curve,” aka “The Anti-Moneyball.”

I could’ve sworn Clint had retired in front of the camera, but even without that it feels bizzare to see him acting in a movie he didn’t direct. However, the director Robert Lorenz has been Clint’s producing-partner and assistant director for a LONG time, so you can’t help but wonder who’s doing what day-to-day/scene-to-scene.

So… looks a little saccharine, to be sure, but hell of a cast: Timberlake has by now solidly proven himself the real-deal, Amy Adams, John Goodman, Robert Patrick, Matthew Lillard? Good lineup for something that will mainly be seen on constant replay at your local VFW Hall about six months after it comes out.

*It’s not so much about Romney being a douchebag (he is, though, I had to suffer through him as Governor) or the Republican Party wholeheartedly embracing the villain-role in THE Civil Rights struggle of the 21st Century as it is that it’s just so… boring. 90-something Hollywood legend pulling writer/director/star/composer duties on grim dramas like a 20-something indie kid? Atypical. Different. Cool. Aging crusty cowboy dude votes Republican? Expected. Cliche. Dull. Not cool.

Here’s another show about TDKR, spoiler-warning kind of implicit in the title…

http://cdn-static.liverail.com/js/handshake.html

Kathryn Bigelow’s “Zero Dark Thirty” – previously known as “Killing Bin Laden” – has released it’s first trailer.

The film, about the international covert manhunt undertaken to find the Al-Qaeda leader in the wake of 9-11, was in-production and shooting before the Navy SEAL raid actually brought Osama bin Laden down and was originally slated with an open-ended conclusion in mind; though that’s obviously no longer the case…

Originall slated to open in October, it was moved to December (read: after the presidential election) in reaction to shameless charges of impropriety vis-a-vi the filmmakers knowledge of military plans from Republican Congressmen and political-hacks panicked at the thought of people being reminded of this American victory at a time when said reminder might help President Obama get re-elected.

Well, let me remind you anyway: Osama bin Laden is dead. Barack Obama gave the order to take him out. This trailer, at least, will probably be in theaters and on TV before the election; and it looks pretty damn good to me.

Variety and others are reporting that there’s big doin’s in the world of Marvel movies once more: Supposedly, Marvel/Disney and Fox are in serious talks about swapping around some rights. See, while Fox is already going ahead with a “Fantastic Four” reboot from “Chronicle’s” Josh Trank; their other Marvel franchise, “Daredevil,” has been stalled after David Slade left the project, and Daredevil’s contract is much closer to running out. So, evidently, the two studios are working out a deal: Fox can keep Daredevil (with JOE FUCKING CARNAHAN in talks to direct! Holy shit!) on an extended contract… and in exchange, Marvel Studios gets the movie-rights to bring both GALACTUS and THE SILVER SURFER to their shared-universe!

Gee, what could they possibly want to have a giant space-monster onhand for?

There’s a school of thought emerging among comic fandom that people should be rooting/pulling for all Marvel movies not being produced BY Marvel Studios to fail so that Marvel/Disney will get the characters back and the Marvel Movieverse can officially add them to continuity. I’m not in that school – it’d be COOL, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t think that Marvel is the only studio capable of doing their characters justice and I do worry that the (at this stage) still more producer-driven, mandatory-schedule manner in which the Marvel Studios movies are being made could scare less “controllable” but otherwise well-matched directors away from certain projects. The idea that average “in-continuity” stories are preferable to good/great “non-continuity” stories because it’s more fun for long-term fans to keep track of the links has been somewhat damaging to comics, I wouldn’t want the same thing to become true of movies.

Besides, not every scenario is Sony/Spider-Man. Spider-Man is a HUGE property, and Sony is a massive corporate entity that regards Disney as a major economic rival; both reasons for them to fight tooth and nail to keep those rights. Fox, on the other hand, is a smaller studio that’s only recently begun to turn around a losing record. It’s entirely possible that they might be willing to ink a deal later, as BAD suggests, to “share” the characters – i.e. Fox gets to make “Fantastic Four,” “Daredevil” and “X-Men” movies but they’d be officially “part” of the Marvel Movieverse via shared credit, profit-swaps, some references (“Hell’s Kitchen hasn’t been the same since Thor dropped a giant space-whale on it!”) and maybe a cameo here or there.

Fox, really, would be crazy NOT to make that deal – whatever it’d cost them short-term would very likely be made up by having a comparitively minor fixture like Daredevil or the still-not-well-absorbed-by-non-fans Fantastic Four get the boxoffice-boost of being tied-in to the juggernaut that is now “The Avengers.” Plus, getting rid of the whole “Fox owns all the mutants” thing would give Marvel/Disney live-action access to a lot of useful B and C-list characters… also, let’s face it: Hugh Jackman would probably be more than happy to put his Logan claws back on for “The Avengers” or a cameo someplace else, since he needs that Wolverine money to support his less-profitable roles (aka any movie where he isn’t Wolverine.)

I’ve heard people joking about “Soldiers of Fortune,” but this is the first time I’ve actually seen the trailer. My response: This is either going to be brilliant or brilliantly-horrible.

The premise, at least, is pretty killer: A rebel insurgency in a third-world dictatorship is looking to fun their revolution by partnering with a slimy “extreme vacation” outfit whose business is leading bored billionaires on safari-esque live-fire paramilitary “missions” in such hotspots. “Something goes wrong,” and suddenly the group of weekend warriors (and their ex-military handlers) are stuck in a real war. The potential for satire is awesome, yes… but nowhere near as awesome as JAMES FUCKING CROMWELL WITH A MACHINE GUN!

FYI, the most recent episode of “The Game OverThinker” is now live on ScrewAttack and on The Other Blog.

Entertainment Tonight running a trailer-preview for the “Red Dawn” remake is a geuine two-fer: I didn’t think either of those things were still happening.

Chris Hemsworth and Josh Hutcherson are not, incidentally, aging backwards – this thing was shot about three years ago and has been shelved largely owing to the MGM crack-up and (reportedly) really, really sucking; then got delayed again to perform a villain-ectomy: Originally the film was about an armed Chinese (replacing the Soviet Union from the original) invasion of the United States; but someone realized that would probably make increasingly vital Chinese distribution/business-relations difficult and decided to digitally re-edit the invaders into North Korea.

The film is now set for a November 21st release date, which will make it only the second stupidest fantasy about expelling imaginary communists from the U.S. that plays out that month.