Finally, something not-awful looking from "Transformers"

“Transformers” finally has it’s round of “real” trailers hitting theatres and TV, and wouldn’t you know it the streak of me being either underwhelmed or utterly horrified by every single solitary promotional image, teaser or “leaked” image from the film is more-or-less over. It’s a good trailer, well cut with lots of action and buildup. Looks like every other Michael Bay movie, yeah, but you were expecting that – and every other Michael Bay movie had a great trailer, too. Michael Bay, after all, basically makes feature-length trailers.

See it here:

The bad news is, well… the Transformers themselves still look like ass. I’m aware that I may as well not even bring that up anymore, because no matter what people will jump to the immediate conclusion that it’s just “fanboy” complaining that they don’t look exactly like their cartoon counterparts, but I just can’t ignore it: From a purely asthetic standpoint, the majority of these guys strike me as some of the most un-cool looking movie robots since “Saturn 3.” I can appreciate the intricacy of all the little wheels and parts flipping around in the transforming animations, and there’s certainly a cohesive “theme” going on – but, I’m sorry.. yuck. They all end up looking like generic H.R. Geiger knockoff “aliens” with car parts glued to them.

Oh, and what little dialogue/acting we’re shown also sucks… but, again, it’s Michael Bay. You were expecting that… though I’m surprised even Bay would serve up a trailer who’s big slugline is “BRING IT!!!!” Sheesh…

In any case, Hollywood is expecting a pretty decent hit from this, so a mini-boom of mid-1980s toy/toon franchise movies is currently being greenlit. Most recent to the table: “Masters of The Universe,” here reported on by CHUD’s Devin Faraci…

…who is really waaaaaaay too grumpy about this sort of thing for a guy reporting for a film geek news site named after a 1980s Daniel Stern sewer-monster movie. I mean, I like Devin, but lately… gah! it’s like he’s auditioning to become Jeffery Wells:

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